


Snakedriver

by RavenZaphara



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Confession, Directly inspired by the song "Snakedriver" by The Jesus and Mary Chain, F/M, Happy 21st Birthday Nat!, Love, Romance, Sans has a run in with feels, Slight Angst?, fluff?, kiss the skele, love is scary
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-28
Updated: 2016-10-28
Packaged: 2018-08-27 12:17:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8401366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RavenZaphara/pseuds/RavenZaphara
Summary: "I don't mind if I get broken, I don't mind if I get fixed. I don't mind if I'm not spoken, I don't mind if I get kicks. If I wake up dead, I'll wake up just like every other day, and the photographs of god I bought have almost faded away. Everything just passes by, I thought it always would...But then I kissed her."Gift to my amazing friend for her Birthday, related to her fic, I'll Go With You. Please check it out!





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Natiform](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Natiform/gifts).
  * Inspired by [I'll Go With You](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7385287) by [orphan_account](https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account). 



He never liked to admit that he felt things without choosing to. He frequently found himself deeper in denial than anything else. Certainly never found himself in love.

Heh, nope.

No, he reminded himself when he began to think again. No, no, no. That was dangerous territory. But right now, he wanted like nothing else to explore it. You looked at the screen, so enraptured by the movie and your smile lit up in the wan lighting. It stirred something in him and he looked away.

Hell, he was just _not like this_. He wanted to just be normal with you, like how it used to be. He wanted to just be there for you, wanted to-- _god_ but your _smile!_

That little voice in his head was incessant now-- and he couldn’t turn it off. In the dark here it was safe right? You were way too into the movie to look over at him. He could afford to stare at you, right? Just right now. Hell, after the movie he could just tell himself it was all a trick of the light…

Right? He groaned internally at himself.

You turned to see if he was watching the movie or if he’d fallen asleep, and saw his eyes on you. You would have assumed he had just glanced at you or something but-- “Sans, what’s up?”

You looked back to the screen, expecting to see something that would prompt that expression, but there was nothing. You looked back at him and he was furiously looking elsewhere, a dusting of blush on his face. He’d looked so distressed before, like he was angry.

“Is something wrong?” You asked, pausing the movie.

He floundered desperately in his head. “nah, kid nothing’s wrong. just... thinking about something, i guess. got distracted.”

You nodded and leaned back into the couch next to him, flashing him that smile expectantly. It really wasn’t fair, he agonized. But still, he could bullshit his way out of this, right?

“Gonna tell me what’s up?” You asked, waiting patiently, giving him a playful slap on the leg.

“heh…. you, uh, sure you wanna hear me?” Buy more time, Sans, you can come up with something!

You only deadpanned at him, waiting for him to just say the damn thing.

He ran out of procrastination techniques. All the puns in the world wouldn’t keep this conversation from happening, he felt. Plus, right now, he was just tired. God, maybe he should just…

“i just feel like…” He paused, glanced over at you. “i never really cared if things didn’t work out for me, y’know? like... as long as paps is safe and happy, and… everyone else too... hell, i know i worry the hell out of paps and i hate it but i don’t mind if i get broken honestly. i don’t care if i can’t be fixed. i... don’t mind if nothing goes right, cause i feel like it’s more important to see everyone else go on.”

Where did this come from? He’d never even _thought_ of this stuff before, at least not aloud. Here it was, though, seeping from him in a rush of ugliness. “if i wake up dead it’s just like any other day, right? heh.” He looked over at you, but the shadows obscured your expression. Were you waiting to respond or were you upset? He couldn’t stop though, even though he tried. “everything just passes by.”

You came forward out of the shadows now, and settled closer before opening your arms. He stared at you for a moment. Finally you spoke. “You don’t have to stop talking, I just wanted to help.”

He felt his face hitch into a grin. What did all that shit even mean? It had come out without a filter, just from nowhere. But he felt so much lighter now. He moved forward to accept the hug, and you engulfed him as best you could with a chuckle. Did this make you happy? Him opening up like this? Why did he feel so shitty anyway?

God but your hair was soft against his face. His arms went around you and he sighed, breathing you in and feeling that pressure in his metaphor-stomach that told him this was dangerous territory he was wading into. You shivered a little and pressed closer to him when his hand rested on your back. Was he making you uncomfortable? No, you sighed contentedly, a giggle working its way in at the last second as you let yourself sink closer still to him. You were damn near in his lap now, and he felt so confused-- but blessed. How did he deserve this?

That little voice made him feel like there was no choice. Yeah, sure he let everything go by without trying to effect it… but not with you. He’d taken that chance, hadn’t he? But since then, that little voice had spoken different things to him. But still, he didn’t let it **gnaw at his bones** if he could help it.

You leaned back a bit and looked at him. He looked back at you. How many times had he made a choice of his own? How many times did he take chances? How many times did he just let things pass by and never try?

How many regrets would he have if he…

He looked at your mouth and glanced furtively back to your eyes. What would you think? Surely you didn’t--

“Please.” You whispered breathlessly.

He felt a leap in his soul and closed the distance. Your warmth seemed to pour into his very soul. That tiny gasp of yours renewed his desire for this to be perfect, and he held you carefully as he kissed you. He didn’t want to admit how amazing it felt to just be **bare bones** \--emotionally-- right now. His arms tightened around you and you hummed against his mouth, fingers scrabbling at his hoodie, as if afraid he’d disappear if you didn’t reaffirm that he was there, mapping him with your fingers.

At last the two of you parted and just looked at each other, each trying to decipher the other person’s thoughts. You grinned wide and he softened, cupping your face in his hand. You closed your eyes and listed into his grip. He sighed, feeling like if he got any lighter he’d start floating away.

He never liked to admit that he felt things without choosing to. Softly, he leaned in and kissed you gently again.

This was okay. This was _perfect_. And so were you.


End file.
